Are Singaporean Women Like This, Really?

There have been enough rumours going on about what Singaporean women want in their potential partners. Are these myths or facts? Let’s look at them and you tell me at the end if you are still dying to meet, date, love and marry a true-blue Singapore girl, shall we? Come on, you know as well as I do that you find this type of girls everywhere in the world. Aren’t there an equal number of men who are after rich women’s wealth and fortune too? 

There have been enough rumours going on about what Singaporean women want in their potential partners. Are these myths or facts?

Let’s look at them and you tell me at the end if you are still dying to meet, date, love and marry a true-blue Singapore girl, shall we?

1. Ticket to wealth

Come on, you know as well as I do that you find this type of girls everywhere in the world. Aren’t there an equal number of men who are after rich women’s wealth and fortune too?

So what makes our home-grown girls stand out, or stick out, then?

A woman looks for financial stability. But somewhere down the road, it has been either wrongly communicated to the men, or they had wrongly assumed that the women are only after riches.

In fact, what she wants is a man who is financially sound, debt-free preferably, and has a stable income or steady flow of revenue to sustain his own lifestyle.

If a man can’t even ensure his own stomach is filled, what sort of assurance is he giving to any potential partner to start a family?

Of course, a well-designed and executed financial plan that includes funds for starting a family, investment, retirement, further education etc makes him a much better candidate than one who is still living off his paycheque month to month.

Now, who doesn’t get attracted to men like that? As a guy, I’m certain even you will feel secure if you know your elder brother has made plans for you.

2. We aren’t iron-deficient!

When was the last time you saw a really gorgeous lady striding beside a man who, well, under the most lax standards of being average-looking, will at most score an “okay looking” grade?

Women, or rather certain breed of women may drool when faced with hunky biceps, triceps, quadriceps or all the available muscles in the world, coupled with a boyish grin and chiselled features.

But, admiration simply stops there! That’s right. Women merely admire men who spend half of their time in the gym working out to look that delicious.

What matters is not the six-pack abs. What matters is the clean smell of personal hygiene, the strong arms that hints of his reliability and the well-ironed Polo Tee he puts on that says he does bother to have something decent besides the working shirts and ties he is mandated to wear by his company’s policy.

We really would love to have a man who spots a slightly bulging tummy whom we can cuddle up to in our spare time, than to have a taut body whom we don’t get to see at all during weekends as he pumps iron, with, well, other men.  Or worse, other women! 

3. Minister of Education?

Sadly to say, there is only one person who holds this position in this little island of ours. That means, there is not enough to go around for half of Singapore’s population of women to find a mate!

Rather than saying women want to date a PhD holder, it will be fitter to say they enjoy the company of men who are knowledgeable and worldly.

A well-travelled, well-read and well-mannered man scores big time than one who is only well-studied and, that’s it!

The reason why the education level has been used to gauge a man’s eligibility is probably because, with all things constant, this is the easiest and fastest way to measure a man’s intelligence and upbringing.

A well-educated man can’t deviate too far from the assumption that he has some ideas on how to behave in a social situation, can analyse a problem faster, have a more acute understanding, better communication skills (though we know this is very much related to one’s personality and character) and has a higher probability of scoring a better career prospect.

If your education level is not as high as the lady, impress your date with what you have in your brains and your heart, not what you have stored in the certificate folder.

I’m sure these aren’t the only misconstrued and misunderstood facts about the Singapore women today. But those mentioned above top the list, so they come under the pen’s scrutiny first.

I may write more in the later articles to clear the air between our opposite genders. So guys, please stay tuned.

Meanwhile, you can start giving me your feedback on these points so that we can have a more meaningful and interactive column?

You want this to benefit you as much as you can, wouldn’t you? So, let’s have some fun knowing more of the opposite sex and demystify what LOVE really is! 

A year older. A year wiser.

A year older. A year wiser. A year closer to death. Cynics exclaim this on birthdays and anniversaries with great perverse pleasure. And this is true.
In the army however, the mentioning of the above somewhat further intensifies the resentment of being cooped up two years in the SAF. Not to mention at this point in time, those who study economics go on and on about economic cost.....

A year older. A year wiser. A year closer to death. Cynics exclaim this on birthdays and anniversaries with great perverse pleasure. And this is true.
In the army however, the mentioning of the above somewhat further intensifies the resentment of being cooped up two years in the SAF. Not to mention at this point in time, those who study economics go on and on about economic cost.....

Yes, I agree, most of us are not Mr. Happy on being here, but I would like to look at this issue as a matter of probabilities, this arising as a matter of me being a mathematics student, and more likely familiar with probabilities than economic costs. Correct, we die. But consider an alternate dimension without National Service. What is the probability that we die at the same age in both dimensions, where in one we spend part of our lives serving as an NSF and then coming back for ICT (In Camp Training), compared to the one where there is no National Service at all?

Let us consider Singapore without National Service. Perhaps it is peaceful.

We are all happy, entering into our chosen jobs or higher education. Then we take a step back and look at the global conditions. Maybe investors will come in, and say “Hey, Singapore is a pretty good place. There are no riots, no civil wars, and no forms of unrest. Let us invest here.” And perhaps another one will say “Hold on a minute, many other countries are like Singapore in this aspect. Does Singapore have an extra factor that may sway our decision?” There may be a debate, there may not be. But the probability that the existence of National Service is a pulling factor that may lure investors here is quite substantial. And the student of economics should be able to explain why more investors would mean a better Singapore, rather than just labouring on and on about economic cost of serving.

Perhaps we shall flutter about in the alternate dimension, and view the rise of terrorism. Starting from 2001, we have seen the planes crashing into the World Trade Centre. We have seen bombings in Bali. We have seen terrorists working in neighbouring countries. And we have seen the foiled plots of terrorists in Singapore. “But it is not wholly the SAF that prevents them!”, cry the detractors. However it can also be argued: Due to the existence of the SAF, perhaps lesser plots are carried out, due to the fear of the army.

And maybe..just maybe..in the alternate universe.. there is a higher probability that a bomb may go off eerily close to home. Poof.

Then again, perhaps the above two negative examples in the alternate universe (and perhaps many more), may be countered by a small action, one that does not involve the creation of the SAF. It can be likened to the Butterfly Effect : A small change in the initial condition of the system, which causes a chain of events leading to large-scale phenomena, i.e., Singapore remaining as it is now, without the SAF. But I would think the probability of finding this is infinitely small, so the SAF is still a viable alternative.

Let us then look at the opposing point of view. Years wasted, and we might die prematurely. Perhaps you can get knocked down by a car and die after serving in the SAF. From the SPF website, the number of people killed in accidents in 2006 is 190, i.e., the number of fatal accidents per 10,000 vehicles is just 2.44. That number is rather small, and surely it is not a matter of National Service if one dies in such an accident.

Or perhaps there’s a training accident. Now, this is quite debatable. Let us consider the Roar of the Lion City.pdf file that is circulating throughout the intranet. It states that the SAF’s safety standards for training are rather high, when compared to other armies throughout the world. And it should be, considering that we are for the large part a conscript army.

True, there are training fatalities that occur. But perhaps we should compare the numbers of NSFs dying compared to the number of regulars dying.

Of course, the TSR (Training Safety Regulations) may not be upheld by some commanders, who may find it inconvenient. And who knows? They may continue doing so until something happens, until an accident happens. They may be charged, yes, sent to DB, but what of the victim? Well, there doesn’t seem to be any one-step solution, but I believe the easiest way to solve this is via the SAF hotline. Because if the PS, PC, CSM, OC do not follow the TSR, help is just a call away. Your life might be on the line. Again, we should see the probabilities of people dying in the SAF. It is rather low surprisingly.

On the subject of human lives with regards to time wasted and maybe death, I agree that it’s very cold to reduce this to a simple matter with probabilities.
Sure, it may be a 0.001 chance of someone dying, but it’s still a life.

Parents are affected, close friends and family are affected. An entire future is affected. One or two lives in the balance, compared to the welfare of over 4.5 million people. I believe it is not a decision to be made easily. I am positive nights were spent agonizing over it, and the decision was made. It is not a light decision, but we should respect it. We do, after all, reap the benefits.

Furthermore, the SAF is changing. It evolves, and adapts to current situations. Even after the decision was made, it continues to improve.
Consider NS40. Take a look at the wide spectrum of experiences and milestones over the past 40 years. We moan and whine about NS, but look at the bigger picture. Can we definitely say that lives in Singapore will be better without NS? Can Singapore find a viable alternative to make this happen? NSFs have a much greater degree of freedom compared to in the past, although most of our time is cooped up in the army. As mentioned above, we have new and improved TSRs. The SAF hotline is always a call away. There is increased bonding between commanders and men. Certainly, I would agree that the probability of NS life now being better compared to the past is almost 1.

Yes. A year older, a year wiser, a year closer to death. But I think I shall die at a ripe old age after having served my National Service.

Ways I’m Preparing Myself For NS (a.k.a. ways to enjoy myself as much as I can in a few months).

Like I mentioned in my previous entry, I’m thinking that enlisting into the army is going to be a pretty radical change in my life (and I’d think you guys would agree with me) so, since I’m not terribly great at adapting to new circumstances, I’ve decided to come up with ways to slowly make my transition into army life more gradual, instead of coming up slap-bang against it one day.

Like I mentioned in my previous entry, I’m thinking that enlisting into the army is going to be a pretty radical change in my life (and I’d think you guys would agree with me) so, since I’m not terribly great at adapting to new circumstances, I’ve decided to come up with ways to slowly make my transition into army life more gradual, instead of coming up slap-bang against it one day.

Since I don’t have that much time left (I only graduated in mid March) and I don’t actually have any real, concrete idea of what NS life is like (plus the fact that I’m lazy and a terminal procrastinator), I’ve come up with a list of what I think I should do for the next few months to integrate myself better. Of course, some of my points might seem just like excuses for me to enjoy myself, but (ssh!) it’s all in the name of *ahem* character building.

1. Exercise
Every single guy that I’ve talked to (as well as common sense, of course) has told me that going into national service is going to be both demanding physically and emotionally. So, since I’ve never been particularly gifted at keeping fit (can’t really keep something you’ve never had, eh?) and I usually scrape barely by the annual NAPFA tests, I figured now would be as good a time to whip myself into shape as any.

After all, settling on a good, regular exercise plan would not only help me to become more battle-ready (read: less embarrassing) when it comes to physical tasks and challenges, it’ll also help me iron up my self-discipline and mental strength, words which, up till now, have been mere vague concepts to me.

2. Spent as much time as possible with family and friends
Going into NS is, needless to say, a pretty full-time job that requires lots of overtime and staying overnight at my “office” so, while it’s not as serious a separation as, say, permanent immigration, I guess it would be a good idea to spend as much time as possible with the people I’m closest to since I won’t really get to do that much for the next two years.

Plus, it’s all part of my plan to spread my irresistible charm and unavoidable charisma (please note the sarcasm; I don’t feel like getting a dozen reply emails telling me otherwise) as much as I can so when I leave, it’ll be like, to quote several cheesy inspirational movies, I’ve left a huge, irreplaceable hole in the hearts of those I’ve been spending time with (which basically means I want them to miss me, lar).

3. Enjoy myself as much I can
Thanks to my hectic work schedule for the past few months when I was serving my final year 6-month attachment (who says polytechnic students have it easy?), I’ve had barely any time to indulge in any of my usual favourite hobbies. Now that I’ve left school and since I have a bit of time to spare, I’m going to engage myself in my favourite activities with a vengeance.

What do I plan to do? Read as many books as I can (as any respectable bookworm must aspire to do), play all the computer games I’ve wanted to rip into but haven’t had the time to, catch up on all the movies and television shows I’ve missed, play the occasional game of tennis (that is, if my bones haven’t been broken by my exercise plan mentioned in [1.]) and, of course, inundate you, dear reader, with the unbelievably exciting tales of my life (again, note the dripping sarcasm).

4. Clean up my act
And I really do mean clean up. As my friends can attest to, I’m a closet obsessive compulsive neat freak and I love to keep things tidy. Since I haven’t had time to the past few months, I’m going to clean up the house, pack (and clear) all my wardrobes, cupboards, shelves and drawers, rearrange all my CDs and books (alphabetically) and even organise my Gmail contacts list which, after months of emails to and from an overwhelming number of clients, is now in a certified mess.

While it might not sound terribly fun, I’ve always loved the feeling I get after I’m actually done tidying up something so I’d just have to push myself through the boring part, which is the actual cleaning up part. I did mention my activities are to build character right?

Thoughts About Enlisting.

I guess NS has always been a pretty daunting aspect of Singaporean life for all guys. Since young (well, as young as I can remember), we guys have always been regaled (and sometimes petrified) by the many stories stemming from the two (and a half, for the more mature ones) years of serving the nation, adventures ranging from the mundane whines (physically torturous, days without showers etc.) to the supernatural (I’m guessing that there are more ghost stories revolving around Pulau Tekong than there are people who have actually gone through NS). 

I guess NS has always been a pretty daunting aspect of Singaporean life for all guys. Since young (well, as young as I can remember), we guys have always been regaled (and sometimes petrified) by the many stories stemming from the two (and a half, for the more mature ones) years of serving the nation, adventures ranging from the mundane whines (physically torturous, days without showers etc.) to the supernatural (I’m guessing that there are more ghost stories revolving around Pulau Tekong than there are people who have actually gone through NS).

So, naturally, I’ve been brought up with the promise that NS would provide a radical change to my lifestyle, to my physical (and emotional, most would say) self as well as all I hold dear in life. I’ve grown up with the belief that, at 18 (or 20, in my case now), life as I know it would stop to exist and I would be thrown into some parallel universe where I would be isolated from my family and friends, have face paint splashed on my face and have to trek through jungles and swamps, all the way operating dangerous machinery that could well destroy the universe if I so much as flicked the wrong button.

While I know now that going into NS isn’t as dramatic as that (at least not about the potentially universe destroying gadgets. I hope.), I’ve always thought of serving my national service with a tinge (or, more accurately, a torrent) of trepidation, not sure of what those two years might hold for me. Horror stories aside, though, almost every guy I’ve met who’s over the age of 30 will tell me that NS is definitely an exercise in character building. Guys go in immature, naïve and childish and emerge, well, none of those (usually). That promise of maturity is the one that helps to offset any fear of going into the army, I guess.

From young, I’ve always been a pretty pampered (but not spoilt, I would like to add) single child, brought up in relative comfort, sleeping with the air-conditioner on for most nights, building the strength of my fingers by playing countless games on different game consoles and getting to eat all the fast food I want (which probably resulted in my less-than-ready-for NS physique at the current moment).

Being the optimist that I am, I hope that serving my NS would make me stronger, fitter, leaner, more patriotic and, above all, more sensible. Cliché as it might sound, I’m pretty tired of being a boy. It’s about time Gabriel becomes a man.

National Service…And The One Thing It Has Done To Me

I literally scratched my head: not only was it itchy, I had to think about what to write for my virgin post on the NS Portal.
Well, I would have really loved to say that it is an honour to be invited to blog here, though I guess it would probably have been over-thanked by the time you finished all the blogs here! 

National Service...And The One Thing It Has Done To Me

I literally scratched my head: not only was it itchy, I had to think about what to write for my virgin post on the NS Portal.
Well, I would have really loved to say that it is an honour to be invited to blog here, though I guess it would probably have been over-thanked by the time you finished all the blogs here!

Prior to this, I was already with the NS Portal for a short while back… even tracing things back till May 2006 where MIW got magically changed to the NS Portal. Some people thought that MINDEF was being flippant with its expenditure when, really, shifting things to NS.sg has made things a lot more consolidated than in the past. We’ve got MINDEF, Singapore Police Force, and the Civil Defence eServices all tied down nicely into one website.

I finished my full-time National Service back in 2006, and joined NS Portal for a short stint that ended in February (that’s last month!) to pursue a diploma in Information Technology. Computers and gadgets have always fascinated me, and if my spending 8 hours a day online is any indication of my hobby, I am an addict of the Internet.

That addiction started way back in the early 2000, when my mum bought me my very first PC. I loved the Pentium III: it ran at a cool 550 MHz, which was very fast in those days. Couple that with 128 MB SD-RAM, it was one of the fastest machines of its day. Of course the glory was short, and very soon we are looking at machines running dual cores, and having 1 GB DDR II Rams are common these days.

While it lasted, I went online for around 4 hours a day on the mySingtel 56-k dial-up service, which at that time cost nothing. The catch was that I had to pay for the telephone dial-charges. When my enlistment came in December 2003, I found myself missing my family and internet connection. Temporarily removed were the days that I could hop around forums to chat and get to know more people. In its place I faced the strict regime of Basic Military Training on Pulau Tekong.

Exercise is an excellent distraction. When you are panting for breath, or straining with weights, there is absolutely no time to think about anything else. The focus is on the present, and of course, the fact that you are about to fart while your buddy is behind you trying to push you up the chin-up bar.

What’s more, as a side effect, I didn’t really use the computer a whole lot once I am back home during the weekends. The best that I managed to muster was to take a shower, do the laundry, and go to sleep. So here lies one caveat: if you want an easier time during your BMT, remember to keep yourself exercising to condition yourself. Otherwise, you end up looking at aching muscles for the first 2 months of your NSF life!

So do share with everybody, how has National Service affected your life during the initial months after your enlistment?