Arsenal: Enough talk of a “major trophy”

Talk of a bunch of self entitled players. This team will not get a “major trophy”, or even a self titled piddling little one. For the second match in a row, Arsenal decided to “wing” it.

Wenger’s memos of bravado do not seem to be filtering down to the players. At the very least, one would expect some positive response to such a bold and unequivocal statement. But the shambolic way the Gunners played the Hammers, it seems clear that some of the big time players believe that their presence is enough to win them games.

Yes, Andrei Arshavin was too cute by half and Fabregas was no Benayoun by half. They were pedestrian and even the goals by RVP and William Gallas came against the run of play. The self assured possession game which was a hallmark of Arsenal’s football was rarely seen. In place was this twisted, mutated long ball form which served no purpose other than gifting the ball to West Ham. As it turned out Carlton Cole and Alessandro Diamanti took full advantage to come back and equalize.

So we plead with Wenger. Can we have a moratorium on the “major trophy” crap or the comparisons of Abou Diaby to Patrick Vieira or of RVP to Dennis Bergkamp? Roll up your sleeves and start winning. Unlike Barack Obama who gets a Nobel Peace Prize just for being the anti Bush, the Premiership is not awarded to a team committing the least number of fouls. 

Third division Alcorcon shock Real Madrid, 4-0

In a Copa Del Rey match, Jerzy Dudek was the goalie under siege as Francisco Borja scored the first goal, a under pressure Alvaro Arbeloa scored an own goal, Ernesto Gomez tapped in a third, and Borja completed Madrid’s woebegone display with his second goal and Alcorcon’s fourth.

Pellegrini rested Kaka and his place was taken by Guti. He was taken out at halftime, visibly upset and replaced by Fernando Gago.

Jorge Valdano later apologized to Real Madrid fans asking for “their forgiveness” and calling it a “sad night.”

“We have to learn a lesson in humility. But we have to trust the professionalism of our players to turn this around.”

Raul also apologized to the fans and vowed a great comeback in the return leg to be played on November 10th.

Manuel Pellegrini said he was “very embarrassed “ and “we must come forward and each take responsibility”. He also denied that he was to resign or leave Real Madrid.

It was clear in the Milan game, Florentino Perez has made defense an after thought. He thought Kaka, Ronaldo, Alonso, and Benzema would compensate for Arbeloa, Albiol, Pepe, and Garay, who while respectable are not exactly world beaters. 

Another real life math question

It’s Wednesday again, and here is the solution to the previous week’s question.

A: Unfortunately, there is only a maximum of 10 vouchers you can take, for while the Dominos personnel come on campus and distribute free pizza + vouchers to students, there is only so many times you can queue up and get vouchers from them before they run out, for other students are trying the same thing. Other students who have to collect the vouchers in return for free pizza, and live on campus and don’t want to fork out the transport costs for more free pizza.

Furthermore, you can only collect up to 5 pizzas, until the guy at the outlet recognizes you, and chases you away. But hey, 5 is better than nothing!

Besides, when looking at the diminishing marginal utility for pizza, and looking at videos of people who constantly eat pizza for a month, 5 is definitely more than enough, for eating more than 5 will definitely render you unhappy!

However, here’s another real life mathematics question about food. Answers given out next week too.

Q: In order to cut cost, and promote bonding between year 1s and year 2s, you come up with a novel idea. Every Tuesday, you will invite a small group of year 2s, and a small group of year 1s (3 each, total 6) to your place. There, you will order out, and mingle for the night. Given that there are 60 year 1s, and 40 year 2s living in your district, how many times can you invite a totally different set of people before the same old familiar group of 6 pops up again? Usual disclaimer applies. 

One way to Lomotise your photo

I woke up this morning feeling an ultimate sense of freedom! Today, I start a new chapter of my life, I’ve finally completed my 2-years degree course! Some might think: Chey… only 2 years what. But it had been a draggy 2, filled with emotional roller coaster rides and uncertainties. On Thursday, I’ll be heading to Bangkok for 5 solid days. John, a nice friend, lend me his Lumix LX3 for the trip!! So, watch out for lots of photos here on this space when I’m back.

Oh ya oh ya… I digressed. I was supposed to “teach” you a trick to Lomotise your photo even though you do not own a Lomo camera. No, I’m not talking about Photoshopping those photos, that will steal the fun of snapping the photos entirely. We’re going to try one of the many Lomo effects - Color splash your photos.

All you need is:

- A Camera with flash
- Transparent glass paper in various colors (You can get them cheaply from Popular Bookstore)

Step One - Cover the flash area with the transparent colored glass paper
- You can cut a piece of the glass paper that fits the size of your flash and stick it over the flash with a transparent tape
- If you have a mount-on flash, simply wrap the glass paper over the flash and secure with a rubber band

Step Two - Start snapping!!!! simple!

You can play around with the color by overlapping 2 different colored glass papers for a different color effect.

These are a couple of photos that were taken at a friend’s birthday party using this technique:

red and yellow glass paper effect

Red + Blue = Purplish Pink

Nike Human Race 2009

Last year’s inaugural Nike Human Race was touted as the first worldwide marathon with a million participants in 25 countries. In Singapore, all the 10,000 slots available were snapped up. Having gone for the first run last year (the blog entry of which you can find several pages down), however, I had some complaints.

For instance, giving out the race pack at last year’s race was a nightmare, with the line snaking down Clarke Quay, and the wait lasting a full three hours in the heat. The route was badly planned, leading to bottle-necking along the way and congestions that totally halted the momentum of the runners who had to stop.

This year’s race however, proceeded in a much smoother fashion.

Despite an even faster adoption rate for slots (all 10,000 vacancies were filled within seven days) and late notifications for the race pack collection (the emails only came a few days before the day and the website was abysmally hard to navigate), the collection itself went smoothly, probably due to the fact it was spread over three days instead of two last year and had a much more organised and larger team giving out the packs. Instead of having to wait three hours, I collected my pack in literally under a minute.

The entry price was lower too ($20 for those under 25) and, while the pack did not feature as many vouchers and freebies as last year, the customised t-shirt (with the runner’s individual number printed on it) and the rubber water bottle more than made up for the value.

The race day itself went smoothly too. Admittedly the atmosphere of the crowd was pretty subdued and low-key before the race (much to the chagrin of event MCs Utt and Sonia Couling and the regional live bands performing on the podium, who did their best to raise spirits), probably due to the early start-off time of 7am compared to last year’s 4.30pm but once the run got underway proper, there was generally a cheerful spirit to the event.

The runners, too, seemed different from last year, more concentrated as a whole. While there were several stragglers last year and people who joined just to walk the entire 10km route, most of the runners this year were doing just that - running, and pretty fast too.

The route was modified. The runners took off (and ended) at the Singapore Flyer and F1 Pit building before passing by Kampong Glam, the Singapore Indoor Stadium and Kallang Road before heading back to the starting point to finish off the 10 kilometers.

To top it off, the weather held too, without rains that had plagued different parts of Singapore in the days leading up to the race. In fact, the sun came out slightly too strong, drenching everyone in sweat barely halfway into the run.

Despite the searing heat, however, I enjoyed the run this year more than last. Although I spent much more time walking and socialising with my friends this year (with my final timing taking a huge hit because of that), the race, from the pre-event preparations to the actual run to the post-event bag collections and goodies, was much better organised.

I had a great time and so did, I believe, the other 9,999 runners.

Yorkshire pizza simply the best

Call me a fast-food junkie but I just love pizza. I have to get my regular pizza fix every month, else I suffer from serious withdrawal symptoms (a.k.a. constant cravings). While I’ve been trying out different pizzas from different eating outlets over the past months, I think I’ve finally stumbled on the holy grail of Singaporean pizza.

Ironically, I wasn’t even intentionally looking out for it. Still, the Yorkshire pizza at KPO (which stands for Killiney Post Office, where it is located) the best ever I’ve tasted in Singapore.

The pizza comprises primarily Yorkshire pork, French mustard, basil, garlic and a delightfully thick helping of mozzarella cheese. It has a strong and absurdly hearty amalgamated taste (topped with an appropriate amount of taste-bud tantalizing fragrance) and the thin crust is crispy yet not too hard, providing just enough morsel for the teeth to work on.

At S$25 for a serving that feeds two to three comfortably, it is not cheap but is worth it as an occasional treat.

KPO Cafe Bar
1 Killiney Road
Killiney Post Office

Tel: 67333648

Operating Hours
Mon-Sat: 9.30am-1am
Sun: 10.30am-11pm

Actually, I can’t do math

When I was in primary school, I was awed by the people who could do perform multiplication calculations (up to 3 digits) almost instantly. I’d go: Hey, what is 426*603, and the next second, I’d hear: “Oh, 256878”. And I had wanted to do the same. I was hoping that one day, I could do the same, that some machine in my brain would go “click”, and then I would churn out the answer.

My parents enrolled me in abacus class during my primary schooling days, and I remember the day when homework was supposed to be passed up. I was supposed to sit down and do it, and when looking at pages of such multiplication questions, and wanting to go play, I did what any normal 7 year old boy would. I randomly filled in digits. See, I finished my work, my parents were happy, and heck the consequences. I’ve always wondered how I ended up doing mathematics at University.

And even now, if you ask me what is the multiple of two numbers, I’d hesitate, take a long while, and then reply, with no assurance that that is the correct answer. My mental acuity is rusty. Except perhaps, what is 256 * 256. I know that one by heart. As well as 2³² And yet, my ‘long while’, is just a few seconds. Maybe it just isn’t the simple “click” the machine in the brain makes, and the answer pops out. It just that you *feel* the mental workout (and it is a pain), but that while you think it takes forever, it is actually a short moment, and pop goes the answer.

In fact, at University, I’m also awed by people who can go to math lectures, and *completely* understand what the lecturer is saying. No, I’m not like one of these people who can waltz into a lecture and understand completely what is being lectured.

However today, I discovered something, when one of my juniors asked me a few questions on Analysis. Having done nine months worth of that, I immediately gave her an answer. And the answer wasn’t just textbook form, but really ‘constructed’ on the fly, so to speak. Or rather, the knowledge was at my fingertips, and all I had to do was to express it mathematically to her. An analogy: Factorize (a² -b²). I’d bet there are a large proportion of you all who can do that *instantly*. But when in Secondary 1, you’d probably take quite a while.

And then I remembered something. About a year ago, I was in that same situation. Only that, I was, too, struggling with my Analysis, and I had NO SENIORS to help me out :( I only had to rely on my lecture notes and textbooks, and I took way too long to finish such questions. Now? The answer comes with a snap of my fingers.

Furthermore, what was I doing when my junior asked me for help? Working on my Analysis III summary notes. Yes, I’ve actually decided to do summary notes not just a month before the exam, but *gasp*, consistently. So I was also working on turning incomprehensible gibberish on my lecture notes, to easy to read even for the layman notes. I’d like to think it has worked, and I can now hold my own with anyone who can tell me they’ve understood the material immediately from what the lecturer says.

What I think: You either are a genius, or must have lots of experience (practice), or understand the material to actually well, “perform well for math’. It’s difficult to be a genius, I believe it is something inborn. You either are one, or not. But understanding the material can be done if you are conscientious enough, and well, experience? That comes with time.

I’m very sure if I had spent a few weeks or months doing nothing but multiplying random string of numbers, my brain *will* click, and I’ll recall odd stuff like “Ok, this digit pairs with that digit, and will give another digit as the result”, and then poof, I can do such tricks like a monkey. Thankfully, I didn’t do that, so I am not a monkey!

However, at this time, I suck at Analysis III. But give me more time, and soon, I’ll be better!

Deal with online griefers

I’ve been blogging since 2003, back in the days where reverse-chronologically dated entries were the sole domains of nerds with their own websites. At that time, Blogger was the talk of the day in the technology sector for its fuss-free interface: you just type whatever is going through your mind that day, and the server generates a nice webpage that visitors can go and view.

We have come a long time since those days. As more people catch on to the idea, and chip in their share in the ever-expanding sea of voices, the tech industry invents new tools and germinate new ideas to evolve this fad. Blog aggregators hit up blog feeds to retrieve updates from the sprawling list of sites so that we can read them all in one place; anti-spam software filters out phishing scams from Nigeria in blog comments; and the arrival of micro-blogging has spun off a sub-category of users on its own (Twitter).

But despite all the breakthroughs we have made in the past few years, there has always been one thing that has remained stagnant: our behaviour online.

Remember the early days on IRC, where trolls had the capability to disrupt conversations by flooding the channel with their own text? And remember how someone would have the bright idea to impersonate a celebrity’s name and persona on the channel, and make rude and potentially libellous statements? I recall how in these early days people have been realising that there’s no effective way to stop the trolls. Because if you kicked them out of the channel, they could just come back, and become potentially even more disruptive.

The rules of engagement soon became clear to users Internet-wide: when you see trolls, ignore them. It soon became apparent that the trolls tried their utmost to be disruptive only because doing so attracts them the attention of everyone else. Never mind that it triggers negative responses — as long as they get even one person to tell them to “shut-up”, they have achieved their satisfaction. And so, over the years of hard trial and error, IRC learnt to deal with trolls by pretending that they don’t exist.

The trend continued. When forum boards became popular, trolls set up shop there too. When blogs became popular, they made their mark known in blog comments. While it is easy to ignore them, just the act of shuffling through blog comments to figure out the bad ones is enough to drive the administrator crazy! Among all their fervent desires, bloggers crave the ability to have software to cut out the trolls and spam without human intervention more than any other technology improvement.

The surprising thing is that companies eventually got to spam. Askimet for Wordpress and funky word shapes that force comment posters to verify that they are human are surprisingly effective against the organ-enhancement product advertisement industry. But till date, nobody has a definitive solution for trolling.

And it is also similarly amazing how little trolling has changed over the years: it has merely shifted its form, and spread to new mediums as they become popular. Perhaps, in its own wickedly twisted way, that is the one constant about human behaviour. Some of us do feel the urge to be jerks just because we can.

In time, maybe someone will come along and offer the final solution to get rid of the griefers. I’m crossing my fingers optimistically. Hopefully though, it’s some fundamental change in human behaviour that would solve the root of the problem once and for all. A less ideal solution would be to have the technology to do the sifting, just like it is doing for spam. But for the rest of us, it’s back to manually combing through the comments for the nits. I pity the interns.

75 million kids need to attend school

It’s a shocking figure: 75 million children in the world are school-less.

FIFA, the world body governing football, is launching 1Goal Education for All campaign, to get all these kids into school.

At the launch in Italy, Queen Rania of Jordan (picture above) delivers a speech reminding world leaders to play by the rules and keep their promises to children of the developing world.

According to FIFA, 1Goal aims to recruit tens of millions of supporters through a mass sign-up. The campaign is asking governments to give more aid to education - an extra US$7 billion is needed.

My personal suggestion: FIFA should ask the various governments to set aside a percentage of all the money collected in legal soccer betting to meet the $7 billion target.

FIFA says the 2010 World Cup - the first to be held on the African continent - represents a unique opportunity to mobilise support around the globe and to provide education, health and a better future for every child on the planet.

Read more

Answer to Real Life Math Question

One week ago, a stats question was asked here.

Strangely, there are many (real life) solutions to this problem, but I have chosen the most elegant one.

1. Create a simple excel file to store some data.
2. View each society’s homepage, for it should list its events for the next few weeks.
3. Fill in the excel file with such data on each day.
4. Repeat this every few weeks.

You should end up with an excel file showing the events each society has on each day, all without the hassle of doing any probability work (which will most probably be inaccurate anyway.) Stats is all well and good in theory, but I prefer this method in real life

Here’s an easier real life mathematics question, the answer to be given out one week from now!

Q: Dominos Pizza gives out vouchers allowing students to get free pizza. The catch is that they must travel out of the lovely campus bubble to their outlet. For students living off campus however, their outlet is just a leisurely 10 minutes walk away. If one current voucher expires on 19th November, 2009, and given today’s date, how many vouchers should you collect to ensure you remain a happy person (at least, until 19th November, 2009)? One voucher redeems a 6 inch personal pan pizza, and assume that people are normal and rational.

My attempt in using a DSLR

Hi Hi....

It has been a long long time since I last updated this blog space. Many apologies for the disappearance. Been really busy with adjusting life in general. Just sitting down, thinking and planning ahead for the next phase of life, which is something that I fear to embark yet could still feel the stir of excitement in my heart when I think about it.

2 weekends ago, I made my way to Dempsey Road in a friend’s car for a saturday late morning brunch, an attempt to experience the “Atas” life that the “upper society” in Singapore normally live. We entered into Barracks Cafe, a cosy restaurant with a tinge of fine dining feel to it. The food menu came creatively in the form of a weekend newspaper, like the size of our local New Paper. I got myself one of the chef’s healthy choices - Asparagus and scrambled eggs with wild rocket. After the hearty brunch, I walked around Dempsey area with my friend’s Nikon D60 DSLR and started snapping random stuff.

Give me your comments on my first outdoor attempt with a DSLR, trying to be an arty farty photographer:

Asparagus And Scrambled Eggs -
Fresh green asparagus served with poached free range eggs,toasted brioche and an intense béarnaise sauce. Topped with freshly chopped tarragon and a garnish of wild rocket.

7-layer Pancake -
Burrow your way through 7 layers of fluffy batter pancakes. Hidden gems and spreads like nutella, green raisins, dried apricots, maple syrup, hazelnuts and pistachios lay within the seams - it’s 7th heaven!

At the entrance of Barracks Cafe

the pink and purple laundry

lonely fan

japanese wine

broken abacus

Just A Little Thought, But . . .

I’m not sure if the other users feel the same way, but it has certainly scored huge brownie points with me. Gauging from my relatively high standards (er-hem, I think so) when it comes to customer service, I suppose this little thoughtful gesture from M1 is, indeed, sweet!

Doing some research on the ground as I began my search, few weeks ago, for a mobile phone (again!), I was having two (or three?) minds on the provider to sign up with. Starhub has its carrot dangling with their hub discounts, effectively pushing Singtel out of the ballgame temporarily. Unless I’m getting the iPhone.

Then came M1 with its Multi-Line saver plans. Therefore I began punching the calculator furiously, and making notes on how much I could potentially save if I were to migrate my plan and my mum’s over to M1. Thousands of questions rose in my head, and I made close to half a dozen calls to their customer service to get all the issues sorted.

That was when I discovered this little thoughtful gesture from M1 that was, indeed, sweet!

As with all the Interactive-Voice Recognition (IVRs) – this is what all these systems are officially called - in Singapore, I was half expecting the voice to run me through a whole list of options before they finally, reluctantly, give me the number to choose to speak to a human being.

But, surprise, surprise! If you were a M1 customer, all you had to do was punch in your mobile number, and the next option was, guess what? The number to choose to speak to their customer service was announced crisp and clear, before they proceed to the other options. And if you use your M1 mobile to call them, you can save the step of keying in your mobile number. Sweet! I was taken aback!

This truly, genuinely, amazingly saves me (and I believe, everyone who calls them) so much time, and I really, really, really appreciate it! This is what I call customer service – by analysing customers’ needs and putting it first.

In contrast, the other companies are only thinking of automating the system as much as possible to raise efficiency and productivity – their efficiency and productivity – at the expense of our time and money.

By thinking about what customers (and potential ones) need and like, and putting our interests before them, M1 is actually creating a genuine goodwill that will only put them in very good light against the other providers. It is a win-win situation. I’m not sure if it actually costs them more, if people take advantage of that option and speak to the customer service officer for issues that could be resolved using the automated system, but even if it does, I believe it still pays off for customer satisfaction.

Having run a dating agency where it was so much about client relations, excellent customer service was one of our company’s motto, and we stuck to it like Winnie the Pooh would to honey. We prided ourselves in having happy and satisfied members. Even when we had to spend a considerable length of time to listen to them, we did it nevertheless. I still remember talking to someone on the phone for more than an hour and eventually she hung up, happy.

Many agencies would frown at such a gesture, because we were effectively cutting our efficiency with such long phone calls. We could have made at least a dozen calls to other members and arranging the same number of dates.

But to us, members came first.

As with M1. That little thought went so far, and did so much for me.

It’s really just a little thought that can count so much. 

I believe if you did the same thing to your partner, your mum, dad, sister, brother, best friend, or even your co-worker, I’m sure it would not only bring a smile to their face, it might just be the best thing that happened to them that day!

And I’m sure they’ll remember it for a long, long time to come.

P.S I was equally thrilled to learn that M1 has won the contract to offer iPhone later this year. Hahaha! I couldn’t stop myself from laughing in glee… Hmm…

To skip or not to skip?

Here’s an easy question. Should your skip lessons in primary school? No, because your teacher would call your parents, and you’ll be caned by them.

Here’s another one. Should you skip lessons in secondary school? No, because if you go roaming in the streets, you could (or your parents) be fined (at least in the UK/US) for being truant, and you’ll be caned by them again!

Maybe another one. Should you skip seminars at University? No, because (in the UK at least), there are ‘key monitoring points’ due to stricter visa laws, and skipping them without a valid excuse (I was playing badminton competitively just doesn’t cut it), can result in one being kicked out of the University. And then your parents will *STILL* cane you afterwards. *Strangely though, the Medical Centre at University seems to see a lot of business as well. Possibly just further applying the lessons learnt before University.

Last question. Should you skip lectures at University? It depends. I’m using University (or polytechnic) as a reference point, only because pre-Uni, your attendance *will* be monitored by teachers, and skipping is just a bad idea.

In a lecture based system, should you? Why, or why not?

I’ll digress a bit here. For those who have had tuition before, perhaps seven days a week, have you ever felt that the tuition you were having was *completely* redundant, and only thought about it as the chance to meet someone of the opposite gender? Cause if you were good in a subject, and had passion in it, you would excel in the subject, with or without tuition. Similarly, if you were terrible at the subject, and hated it, you would not do well in the subject, with or without tuition. All it takes is discipline, and a will to study. At least, this is what I believe, and think tuition doesn’t do any good at all. Especially if you have parents who cane you if you interact with anyone of the opposite gender.

Back to the point. Should you skip lectures at University? You might as well do so if you dislike the material covered and can’t stand the lecturer, *but*, if you do so, you had better self-study and pull off a first. Similarly, you might as well do so, if you are already know the material extremely well, and attending lectures are just a waste of time. Then you might as well skip the lectures and self-study too. So what does that give us? Attend lectures for modules that are just ‘in-between’, and lectures for modules deemed too difficult to understand at a glance. Come to think of it, that’s what I do at University, and also attend lectures where I believe the lecturer is either a) extremely good in teaching or b) would do well in a second job as comedian.

Controversial stand? After all, University fees aren’t cheap, so why skip lectures? I skip lectures precisely because the University experience isn’t *all* about lectures. Lectures are just a small part of University life, and to be extremely honest, I would skip lectures if the lecturer

a) is lecturing something I have already covered in O or A levels, because I can and *will* self study on my own.
b) is lecturing based on a set of lecture notes, with no deviation. I can just read from my lecture notes then, and self study.
c) can’t lecture. Self study again.
d) is lecturing easy material which can be self-studied.
e) is lecturing modules which are open book exams. (I’m sorry, this is where I become very Singaporean and construct my own open book by looking at the kinds of questions that can be set *think TYS*, and even draw a diagrammatic flowchart in my open book in what to do with each question. Does it help? Yes and no. Yes because I actually remember things while doing the flowchart, and no because during the exam, I never used my open book at all.)

Which perhaps explains why in my first year, there is only one module in which I have never skipped *any* lectures at all, but unavoidably missed one, because I was in London at the time. And maybe the last consolidation optional lecture before the exams, because I honestly forgot about it and was studying with someone else. And that module is Analysis! Apart from that, I attend lectures very sporadically.

Is it worth it? Sure, there are many things you can experience at University. Society activities, mixing with a large group of different nationalities, participating in competitions, taking part in socials, exploring campus, finding some quiet time on your own (this works well during lecture periods, because everyone else is at lectures), and more. Does it have an impact on your grade?

I don’t know. Anything I say could be an anomaly, an anecdote, something that just applies to me, or the course I’m doing. I’m no good judge of this. I have seen people who skip all lectures, and end up by skipping exams, and then literally skipped out of University. I have also seen people who don’t attend lectures, spend 24/7 in their room, and pull off 100% in their exams. I have also seen people between these ranges. 

But I think it’s all about confidence, and the discipline to self study. If you are confident you can pull it off, willing to self study to make up for lectures skipped (or study with a partner, this always helps, and doesn’t necessarily have to be someone doing the same course), then skip a lecture or two. It’s perfectly fine. It’s also not like you haven’t done the same before too

I have skipped lectures in my first year, perhaps *far* more than I should, and I doubt I have attended more than 50% of my lectures in year 1. And you know, according to some weird criteria on some piece of paper, this means I’m not a very good student. Perhaps even pathologically lazy and can’t be bothered about University. On the other hand, when I haven’t been attending lectures, I have spent the time wisely. While I must admit perhaps playing badminton (against people who think they are good) or visiting people or having society events might not actually be a good use of time, I also do proportion some time in studying (either alone, or with other/s), as well as playing with chalk using the blackboard in my department and explain concepts in lectures to others! It’s fun too.

*Well, perhaps playing with multicoloured chalk is more fun.

Which is perhaps why I haven’t done that badly for my first year, although I have surprised some people who thought I would have gotten higher. *Like some who thought I was the person who achieved 98% in our year. Nope. Not there. See, I’m trying to cast out the image that Singaporeans are all mugger toads, and only know how to mug and score full or near full marks. So far, I’m not entirely succeeding. Anyway, I’m curious. Do local Universities give money as well if you perform well in your year? I only know Warwick Stats Department does, but a cursory search on Google doesn’t show that information anywhere on the Warwick website.

PS. If you’re reading this, Mdm Rahimah, I’m sorry! I only got a high second upper for my only Econs module :( I promise I will get a first for both my Econs modules this year.

The Army Husband’s Guide 4 – Kids Connection

So, you’ve been in and out of your home very frequently, and to your children, you’re slowly turning into just a face that appears when it appears. Like the visiting uncle, or neighbour.

But you know the difference. You are not the visiting uncle. You are their father, and you want to and have to be involved in their lives. Question is, in what way?

Are you going to be the disciplinarian? Or are you going to be your kids’ best friend?

It’s challenging to be both simultaneously, but you realise that’s the best possible solution. After being away for some time, it really pains you to be home (finally!) and start brandishing the cane in front of your misbehaved children. Yet, you cannot sit there and allow them to exploit your kindness as this is going to add to your wife’s burden when you’re away again and she becomes the disciplinary mistress.

There is no best way to do this. You have to discuss with your wife and agree on the rules that have been set for the children and to follow them regardless of a returning father’s love. However, that doesn’t preclude you from getting down to your knees and really be their friend. Here’s how you can do this:

1. Reading to them

Read a story book to your infants. Record your story telling in a DVD so that whenever your kids miss you when you aren’t around, your wife can play the DVD and get them instantly connected to their daddy through the story.

Remember to make the story more animated, and every now and then, raise your head and give them good eye contact.

Since you’ll probably know how long you’ll be gone in the next deployment, you can record the stories before hand. One new story every week should be good enough to last them until you’re back.

2.  Make it personal!

Have some me-time with your children, especially if they’re in their pre-teens or teenage years. They are at a sensitive stage where they may see themselves as adults and therefore, not willing to see you as the figure of authority.

If you have more than one kid, have a meal or chat with them separately. Bring them for a nice dinner, or an activity they enjoy doing. Have a heart-to-heart chat. Let them know what you have been doing during your absence, and find out more about their lives too. Listen with an open-mind. Do not be quick to infuse your own values and perspectives into theirs and start lecturing them on what should be the correct thing to do. Remember, you want to connect with them, and to do that, you have to be at their level and see things from their eyes. 

Be a teenager in your heart, and a father in your head.

If you realise your adolescent is not opening up to you as openly and freely as you hope, be patient. After all, they have their own lives and you’d rather respect their need for privacy than to pry and insist they spill the beans on what they have been up to with their friends when daddy wasn’t home.

3. Family time

Go out and/or do things together as a family. It’s important for your children to know that the family is whole despite you being absent so often. And going out or doing things as a family is the best way for them to feel the bonding and love shared as a unit.

You can watch a favourite movie at home together, eating popcorns and discussing about the characters or just having a good laugh.

Have dinner as a family is also a good way to catch up on each member’s day. The family that eats together stays together, or so they say!

4. Helping out

Your children may have been assigned certain chores to help out around the house when you aren’t around. When you’re back, how do they feel about you doing some of these chores? Are they excited that you’re sharing the tasks with them? Or do they feel like you’re treading on their territory?

Depending on how your children react to you helping out around the house, you can either let them continue as the way it has been without you or you can chip in your bit of strength and labour away with them as part of your bonding exercise.

The key here is to be aware of what changes has taken place in your absence and blend yourself in as smooth as you can. But, there can never be a transition without any hiccups, so, be patient with yourself and your family.

This wraps up the series The Army Husband’s Guide for you, our soldier husband and daddy. 

It’s never easy to juggle the nation’s duties and your family’s duties on your shoulders at the same time. It certainly isn’t something that comes as-is, therefore continuous and open communication and efforts have to be constant between you and your wife. When there’s a will, there’s a way! 

Pendragon

Despite my old age of twenty-two, I’m still a huge fan of teenage and young adult fiction, especially from the fantasy genre. Like most other young adults in Singapore, I’m a huge fan of the Harry Potter series (although Twilight not so much). With that said, though, there’s another seriously under-marketed young adult series that holds a place in my heart.

The Pendragon series, written by D. J. MacHale, is a ten parter urban fantasy series that is easily my favourite book series of all time.

Set against the backdrop of ten different worlds (or “territories”, as it is known in the books), one of which is earth as we know it, Pendragon tells the story of Bobby Pendragon, a normal American teen who’s visited by his eccentric uncle, Press. Press tells Bobby the truth about his real identity - he’s actually a “traveller”, a group of individuals (one per territory) chosen to guide their home territory and keep it from the evil machinations of Saint Dane, an enigmatic spirit who seeks to destroy all ten territories, known collectively as “Halla”. In fact, he’s the lead traveller, tasked to take charge of the protection process.

Each book in the series takes place primarily on one of the territories, with Bobby travelling to and fro territories via an extradimensional transport tunnel known as a flume. Every book takes the form of journals written by Bobby to his acolytes (his earth-bound helpers) and best friends Mark and Courtney and details his adventures in each territory, meeting with the other travellers and the ways he foils Saint Dane’s plans, gradually leading up to a climatic finish in the last two books.

What makes the series so great is the sheer amount of planning that has obviously gone into the books, with intricate plot twists and well-thought out sequences. All ten books were obviously planned together as several books foreshadow later books while the latter often refer back to hints dropped in earlier books.

While some of the earlier books could be read on their own, it is advisable to go through the books in sequential order to get the full development of the considerable storyline.

Despite the heft of the books (each entry in the series is easily close to 600 pages), I have never had to struggle to finish any of them. MacHale’s writing is concise, exciting and the dialogue is believable and at times snazzy. While some plot developments are pretty predictable, the overall story is engaging and gripping and everytime I get a new book, I’ve had to devour as much of it in one shot as possible and I carried it with me everywhere I went.

So, if you’re still mourning the ending of the Harry Potter or are recovering from the saccharine cheese of the Twilight or are just looking for a good read, why not give this series a try? The final installment, Soldiers of Halla, has just been released so you won’t even have to wait for the entire series to come out (as I had to, excruciatingly). I guarantee you’ll love it.

Real Life Math Question

After looking at some comments on the previous blog post, I thought I might as well refine the question. Solutions to this *will* be posted one week from now.

Real life mathematics problem

Let S = {s₁, s₂, ... , s₂₇₅} denote the set of societies belonging to a University, U. Let W = {w₁, w₂, ... , w₃₀} denote the weeks of the academic year, and to simplify matters, assume each week has 5 days (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday).

Let X and Y be two random variables.

Let the random variable X be a discrete probability distribution function, with support {2.50, 3.00, 3.50}, and mass function f_x(2.50) = 0.1 , f_x(3.00) = 0.8, f_x(3.50) = 0.1 , where f_x(X) is the probability that joining a society s_n (1 ≤ n ≤ 275) costs £X.

The number of events (with free dinner catered) organized by a society s_n (1 ≤ n ≤ 275) is modelled by a Poisson variable with rate of λ per week. Denote this random variable by Y, and assume 0 < λ ≤ 0.2.

It is also noted that by the end of week 2, every society would have held their AGMs (Annual General Meeting), in which a free dinner is assured, and each society chooses a day from w₁, w₂ with equal probability.

A decent meal costs £3.00 when bought / ordered, and costs £1.00 when cooked.

Now, in real life, given the above information, and assuming that one is rational, how many societies should one join in order to save as much money as possible? You can use any parts of the information provided above. If more information is required, write down what information is required, and how you would use the extra information to come to a decision.

Also assume that one can only attend one event/AGM per day, to avoid being labelled as a kiasu Singaporean.

Random math question

Here’s a random math / economics question which popped into my mind. Any similarities or relations to any situation in real life is entirely coincidental.

Assume there exists a University, where the fee to join societies range from £2 to £3. Assume also that each society holds at least one AGM (Annual General Meeting), where free food is provided, and may also hold other events which provides sustenance as well. The question is: How many societies should a person join in order to maximize his benefit if he is lazy to cook dinner? Take note of diminishing marginal returns, such as when one gets to the stage that one day may have two (or more) AGMs of different societies. Also assume that the cost of dining out is about £3 - £5, and that the cost of cooking oscillates around £1.

Bus rides

It’s back to the days of rushing off to school in the morning, waking up at ungodly hours just to catch a bus, or take the MRT to one’s destination. For second year at University without on campus accommodation can be a hassle, and it some cases, a nightmare. Particularly so when you oversleep and miss lectures because of one.

You see, there are two cases. Either the buses come on time, or they don’t.

Try waking up at 7:45 am for a 9:00 am lecture, and going to the bus stop at 8:20 am. There is a long queue there. A bus comes on time, is filled up, and zooms off. You’re still stuck in the queue. Another bus comes on time, people dash on, you’re about to reach the door of the bus. Dang, the bus is filled. You wait, and hum a small tune. People *stare* at you. The third bus comes, and you get on it. You sit down, see the bus go past other bus stops, all crammed with people waiting for the bus, the bus you’re on, which zooms past them. You wave cheerily at them. They *growl*. Whatever happened to the cheerful British stereotype?

In some ways, living quite a distance from campus has its benefits. You don’t need to walk as far to the bus stop *further* from you, so you can get onto the bus.

That’s when the bus comes on time.

Then there are times when the bus simply doesn’t show up. It isn’t late per se, but the bus that is scheduled at that time..’disappears’.

So you could wait at the bus stop at 11:30am intending to go to a 12:00pm lecture, and find that the bus still doesn’t appear at 12:20 pm. Which in that case, you might as well head back home to sleep, because the lecture will most probably be over when you arrive on campus.

That’s when the bus doesn’t come at all.

So yes, maybe that’s when one longs for the familiar SBS buses and MRT where you get to squeeze into a filled compartment with stinky, sweaty people, and STILL reach school late!

Thankfully, the above are all extreme cases (which coincidentally HAPPENS on the first week of school), and the bus service in Coventry really isn’t like that. It’s better. Though, I’d buy a bike.

Tussle over football

It’s like football drama, except that it’s really just meta-football drama. I’m talking about, of course, the exclusive rights to broadcast the British Premier League in Singapore.

Singaporeans are really, really mad about their football. And we’re speaking about a pitch that borders upon feverish (only faring slightly better than a Michael Jackson concert: you might seen all the fainting fans!). Barely a short while ago, when Liverpool made a trip to Singapore for a friendly match, the National Stadium packed to the brim with red-shirts. Fans even chased the football club members from the banks as their hired boat cruised down Singapore River on a day trip.

With such overt displays of crazy devotion to the game, pay-TV operators wring their hands in glee, probably having fantasies of being handed Yusolf Ishaks on silver platters by these fans. Of course, towering above them is the company controlling the broadcast rights to the EPL. It takes great pleasure in dangling exclusive rights to the operators. SingTel and StarHub bite the bait and go into a bidding frenzy, fuelled by the aim of crushing the other side.

Unfortunately for everyone, whenever the auction hammer strikes, EPL seems to be the only one laughing. The losing pay-TV operator watches sullenly as the huge slice of the market continues to hover over the other side of the fence, while the winning operator writes the multi-million dollar cheque with the bitter after taste of its pyrrhic victory. Football fans gasp in collective shock at the price hike that they would now need to suffer because the winning operator decided not to absorb the ridiculous premium it forked out for the rights.

These days, if you see anybody with a smile permanently etched from ear to ear, you can probably bet that they’re from the EPL. Because absolutely nobody else is smiling right now. This year, when StarHub decided to keep prices down by bidding normally, SingTel one-upped the bid with what must have been a price so much higher than StarHub’s that they won almost immediately.  With the league matches now scheduled to migrate over to SingTel from next year, football fans now have to fork out additional money to install and subscribe to another pay-TV service.

Oh yes, there’s going to be a lot of kicking and screaming. Football fans have been asking the Media Development Authority to review the current system. But we all know that at the end of the day, most of them are just going to pony up the money anyway.

I don’t think it is a demonstration of weakness though. Rather, the fans’ love for their clubs and football itself far transcends the annoyance of being ripped off. It’s the same as how couples scrimp and save their salaries for that grand wedding on the lush red carpets in Raffles Hotel; and not unlike how World of Warcraft game fanatics continue paying monthly subscriptions to the multi-player game.

That makes it all the more frustrating for me to see people get ripped off just because they had to do something they love. The rampant capitalism on people’s feelings ought to be checked, especially where the people end up being the ones getting hurt.

I suggest that the MDA create a holding company that would be responsible for bidding for any exclusive pay-TV content. This holding company can then resell the rights to the operators at a reasonable price. This model is similar to what’s being done for the Next Generation Broadband. Both operators get content they need to innovate new ways of earning revenue, and the lack of a bidding war can only mean better prices for subscribers.

But what about the content distributors? Changing the rules of how content distribution is done in Singapore reduces their advantages, but it is not a total disincentive for them. They may be unhappy, but with a relatively modest market of really devoted fans, they would hesitate about skipping over Singapore just because future bids are far lower than the stratospheric bids they received in the past. It’s not a game-changer, it is a game normaliser.

The mechanisms of Capitalism can only work properly when the proper pre-requisites are met. Singapore’s market is small, and the dynamics of our country make it difficult to cut-and-paste a standard approach towards a free market. This is where regulation comes in to engender the conditions for Capitalism to work properly, creating value for businesses, as well as consumers.

World Class Goalkeeper

When all the talk has been about England having to succeed with 6 possible goalkeepers, there is one Spanish goal keeper that never fails to deliver!

Real Madrid’s vice captain and Spain’s national captain Iker Casillas made a world class save for his club against Sevilla that will make whichever English goalkeeper drool will envy. The James, Carsons, Fosters, Greens, Harts, Robinsons, will NEED to look at this and learn!

Alan Wiley ran further than most Man U players

Alan Wiley, the official accused by Sir Alex Ferguson of not being fit enough to referee, ran farther than all but four Manchester United players during the 94 minutes of the game against Sunderland.

ProZone shows that only four United players and three from Sunderland ran farther than Wiley, 49. His average distance from the ball was 17.7 metres. Elite referees in England are allowed an average of up to 20 metres.
There’s a clamour of protest from the referees union.
The national secretary of professionals’ union Prospect, who represent referees, Ian Leighton said: “I don’t know what Sir Alex earns but a small fine or a touchline suspension would be like water off a duck’s back to him, so there has to be some recognition that this is a serious allegation that needs to be properly dealt with and punished severely.There are issues around suspension from the job that would be new territory, but the FA has to grab the nettle on this one. There has to be some sort of punishment that’s going to stop people from doing this or otherwise we’re going to see more and more of it.
We have to be talking about punishments that are going to really lead to a change in behavior.”

New rules of engagement in an uncertain world

“The future ain’t what it used to be!” said Yogi Berra, a legendary baseball player in America. With George W Bush, Osama bin Laden and Lehman Brothers messing up the world, the future is even more uncertain and unpredictable.

We need new rules in the workplace, to cope with the changes, threats and challenges of future shock. Follow these new rules and thrive. Ignore them and suffer the consequences:

Have long-range and mid-range goals. The future is unpredictable, but if you don’t know your mid-range and ultimate goals, your own future will become even more unpredictable!

Why live with uncertainties? Each morning when you wake up and get out of bed, you should know where you are, along your road to success.

Chart the route and identify your milestones. Once you have defined your goals and destination, your next task is to chart the route and decide where to place your intermediate milestones along the road. Success is a long, meandering, bus ride with toilet stops at every station.

Work smarter. In the past when Singapore was a poor country and almost everyone lives in Chinatown cubicles or attap huts, you had to labour hard, and harder than your fellow labourers, just so you could keep your job. Today, you still have to work harder as well as smarter than everyone else, just to stay ahead.

Working smart means to use your intelligence and creativity, not brute force, to accomplish your tasks.

Beware the co-workers and bosses who offered nothing but promises. Don’t stick it out with a boss you can’t rely on. If you haven’t received the raise or promotion your boss promised five years ago, it’s time to find another boss.

Don’t be modest. As soon as you’ve reached one milestone, celebrate. By all means, work hard, but learn also to have a good time. Americans have a term for it: “bragging rights”—the right to proclaim your success and give credit to yourself. This will develop your self-confidence and self-esteem.

Don’t be like a certain politician in old England whom Winston Churchill described as “a modest little man with much to be modest about”!

Maintain your own internal value set. You must have a set of work values that goes into any dealing you have with your co-workers, your bosses, and your company’s partners and customers. These values include integrity and commitment to the quality and performance of the work that you deliver.

Enjoy your work. Look at your working hours as a source of joy and gratitude. Be grateful that you have a job and a regular income, and enjoy your work. A life of graciousness and gratitude every moment of the day is a beautiful life.

Find a niche and fill it. If no one needs your skills, products and services, you will have very little chance to prove your worth. If you want to succeed, find a niche where you can be, and do your best. Your expertise, however, must be made known and accessible to others in the organisation.

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. If you still don’t succeed, move on and try something else. What worked before may not work again.

Have Plan B ready. Being an excellent performer or working with a profitable organisation is no guarantee of long-term employment. Thousands of great performers have lost their jobs, and hundreds of great companies have folded up as new business “rules of engagement” emerge. So start writing up Plan B (your fallback) now.

Innovate or stagnate. There is always a better way to do your work, and find it before someone tells your boss about it. When the playing field is level in terms of quality, speed and cost, your competitive advantage is from new and creative ideas and solutions.

Look beyond the classroom. The old rules of success say you should not stop learning. The new rules say productive, useful education takes place in the real world, not simply in the classroom.

Learn the technology of business and the business of technology. You need to know both: (a) technology and how it helps you do your job faster, better and more productively; and (b) the business and monetary aspect of technology.

Be lucky. Luck comes when you are well-prepared.

Overcome the fear of failure. Many people never succeed because they never try. They never try because they fear they will not succeed; so they stuck themselves in a vicious cycle. Successful men tried and failed and tried again and succeed. They have hooked themselves to a virtuous cycle.

Perception is reality. You think, therefore you are. There is no “real” you or permanent self, only an aggregate of your feelings, thoughts, will power, words and deeds. People treat you based on this perceived aggregate. That’s why successful individuals are careful to create the right perception about themselves (known as personal “branding”).

Make quality your policy. If you want to succeed, do not turn in shabby work. Nobody accepts poor quality any longer. There’s too much competition nowadays (consider your co-workers as competitors in your career advancement). That’s why successful companies and individuals deliberately factor in quality in whatever they offer.

Combine Reason with Intuition. If everything in life is logical, this world will be gray and static indeed. Intuition sparks creativity, innovation and daring, but must be built on practical reason.

Think lattice, not ladders. Career success today is no longer just moving up the ladder. Now, there are more lattices than ladders that allow you to achieve success not by simply moving upwards, but by moving sideways and diagonally, too.

Tap into other people’s brain power. Even Augustus Caesar, the first emperor, depended on his partner Mark Anthony to defeat their enemies and establish the Roman Empire. Successful individuals depend on the expertise and knowledge of a huge number of other people to be successful.

The customer is usually wrong, but make them feel appreciated, anyway. The customer is always right, is an urban legend. But whether your customers are right or wrong, listen to them, understand their needs and problems, and offer solutions that meet these needs. That’s all there is in appreciating the customer.

Watch your back. As you shine, others will envy you. Be alert.

Act responsibly for your own future. Do not abdicate responsibility for your success to your ma or fairy godma. Nobody cares if you succeed; but when you fail, the whole world will gloat.

Be enthusiastic. Work hard, work smart, and work enthusiastically. It’s easier to forgive someone for his mistakes at work when he is known as an enthusiastic worker.

Permethrin — hazardous to human health?

The lush tropical forests in Singapore are home to some of the most irritating insects in the world. Anybody who has gone into the local rainforests can testify to the annoying prowess of the mosquitoes.

These creatures literally seek out the blood and suck it out of anybody who leaves his skin exposed. Most times, the victim feels nothing during the actual attack, the inevitably itchy feeling coming on only after the attacker has finished its meal, and has long gone. In certain areas, commando mosquitoes have the power to pierce through clothing to get to the blood. I personally attest to this at the rifle ranges in Pasir Laba.

Since most army training includes outfield exercises in the forests, people have been finding ways to counter the mosquito menace. In recent years, somebody had the idea of soaking clothes in an insecticide solution commonly known as Permethrin. Each person was issued one bottle of the stuff, and told to soak all his uniforms in it. In theory, after a few hours of soaking, the clothing should be able to repel mosquitoes, if not kill them.

What made me nervous was the long list of precautions and warnings on the side of the bottle box:

“Wear gloves when handling.”

Oh well, I couldn’t honestly expect anything that actually serves to kill other living things to actually be totally harmless to us humans, can I? Nevertheless, we handled the soaking solution with our bare hands, and washed our hands very thoroughly with lots of soap after that.

Now, 4 years after that, I find an online article published barely days ago, establishing a link between use of Permethrin, and the increased risk of Parkinson’s disease. That seriously can’t be good news.

I’m nervous about the use of this insecticide on our army personnels’ clothings. In the light of these findings, I think it’s time for the army to find a different pesticide instead, as a precaution. In the meanwhile, I’m going to stick to the standard green stick repellent. Although it burns when I apply it to my skin, it does seem to work to repel the mosquitoes. And when I can’t bear the stinging sensation any more, there’s always gloves for the hands, and camouflage scarf for the face and neck.

Or you can simply just hope that your buddy is more attractive to the mosquitoes than you are.

Is Life a Storybook?

The page turns.

The heroes face the cube of gelatinous ooze. An old man, wearing grey robes and a tattered hat, absentmindedly drops a pinch of bat guano on the floor. “How does it go again? Billiard ball! No wait, Fire Extinguisher. No, that’s not it...” The cube wobbles threateningly.

(Strangely, some dice is heard rolling in the background.)

Another page is flipped.

And the party emerges victoriously from the Dungeon of Doom under the Castle of the Craven, high above the Peaks of Peril, holding their prize, the Golden Goose which lays the Golden Eggs. All is well.

The dungeon master stops narrating from the guidebook.

“Well then, that’s settled, all of you lucky buggers that survived are now awarded experience points, you all gain a level, and hope you had fun journeying in the mystical Lands of Lore. See you again next week.”

The adventure is over.

Back to mundane life. Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s off to work we go. It’s the same old rut, and only the weekly gaming sessions allow one to escape into the realms of fantasy, where one can be in control of one’s own life.

If only life was like a storybook.

But, upon further reflection, why should life be like a storybook? Because the best thing about life is that you can do whatever you want. You’re only restricted by your imagination. Imagination, something which flows so easily when playing table-top games, but surprisingly becomes restricted when faced with “real life”.

But why does this happen? Could it be due to abstract ideas like “social conformity”, “go with the majority”, that one doesn’t want to step out, and do something different? Or is it because of the: “You want to act like hero ah, and become high profile?” that people say? Perhaps it is just being self-conscious. Why do weird things, instead of normal, plebeian ones?

I don’t know. But gee, when faced with choices on what to do, I usually try not to follow the main crowd, but do what I personally feel should be done.  Do what I want to do, not what society expects me to do. It makes for a more interesting life, too.

No internet

Perhaps sometimes, you do take things for granted. Like say, take on campus accommodation at University, and off campus accommodation. For on campus accommodation, everything is settled. Electricity, gas, water supply, insurance, people to clean the toilet, and more are arranged by the University. You don’t have to worry.

Then take off-campus accommodation. Suddenly, you have to gao dim everything yourself. So you do that. And on the very day you arrive, you forgot something. “OOPS” you go. But it’s too late.

You find out that you don’t have… an internet connection. And the whole world crumbles. Deadlocked. Everything is online, from timetables to settling fees to arranging meetings via IM.

So just lan lan suck thumb and wait for the day (NOW!) that I have internet!

Where Have All The Lanterns Gone?

Happy Mid-Autumn Festival my dear friends!

I was having breakfast this morning when it suddenly dawned on me that I haven’t been seeing any shops selling lanterns. Only mooncakes were displayed abundantly everywhere. So, where have all the lanterns gone?

I miss those lanterns of yore sorely. Coming in various designs - chicken, rabbit, dog - these lanterns made of colourful translucent papers were hanging proudly in the shops, blatantly wooing children like myself to pester our parents for some money to buy them home.

Then, we would wait impatiently for the day to arrive, I mean night, so that all the children would rush out from their homes and show off their lanterns, brightly lit with candles! Yes, it was after some time that battery operated lanterns came into the market. However, those lanterns did not charm us one bit. Rather, the good ole’ fashion of candle-lit ones made our adrenaline rush to the fore.

Holding these lanterns in our hands, we were all reminded - for the 1001 time by our parents and grandparents - to watch out for the fire. Hence, everyone was extremely careful not to swing the lanterns too much and not to run. Now come to think of it, what is so fun and exciting about merely walking around holding a potential fire hazard, albeit beautiful, cute and interesting? It just was fun.

The candle flames made our faces blush and we all look pretty and handsome under the flattering light. The smiles on our faces further lit us up in glowing radiance. The jolly atmosphere enveloped everyone under the beautiful round moon dancing happily in the sky.

Mooncakes were shared among neighbours and everyone chatted and laughed until the night was no longer young. Then, very reluctantly, we blew off our candles and retired our lanterns for the year. And once again, we began to wait for next year to come when we could bring these animals out again into the glory.

Hmm ... those were the days of how we celebrated the Mid-Autumn Festival when I was a child. It was a day where people build relationships and strengthened their bonds with each other.

How do you celebrate yours? 

The Army Husband’s Guide 3 - Reconnecting

I kickstarted this series with the post about the fundamental C – Communication. I mentioned that your wife is most probably playing in her mind loving and cosy images of you returning home from a deployment.

The truth is, more often than not, you may not be in the mood for such nice and lovely reunion. You might need to take a short break to be alone, and use this time to come to terms with life back home.

This reconnection can be tricky. On one hand, it seems a no-brainer to re-integrate yourself back into the family since you’re a part of it anyway.

On the other hand, there could be a few challenges lurking around the corners waiting for you to tackle them wisely. Yes, the key word here is wisely.

Things are happening every day, every moment even when you’re not around. To get up to speed on the past events that have taken place is something you need to do as soon as possible without feeling overwhelmed.

Your child may be stringing words into sentences that you find hard to construe when just before you left, he is only making some incomprehensible noises.

Your cousin has just given birth and everyone is gushing about this newborn in the whole family, while you can’t even attach a face to the baby’s name.

Your wife has a promotion and the family celebrated it with her by having a scrumptious meal without you around.

New rules have been set in the house so that the toddler wouldn’t burn the house down due to your negligence.

There has been some bad news too. Someone in the family has been retrenched; fallen ill, or just recently had a bad break-up.

With all these events happening, big or small, certainly the atmosphere and dynamics in the family has changed. How are you going to adapt to all these in short notice and settle in comfortably?

How has your role in the family changed now that you’re frequently absent? You may find that decisions have to be made in your absence, and chances are even when you’re back, this “head of the family” title may not be so naturally reinstated in a moment’s notice.

Be patient, and at the same time, do your best to help around the house as much as you can. Be as involved in the lives of each family member as you can. Let them know that despite you not being with them, your heart has always been caring for them.

Take a stroll with your wife. It is a great time to just chat about anything under the sky and listen to each other intently. Listen to your wife when she tells you what has been going on in her life while you are not around. This will make her feel that she’s still special in your heart.

Are you able to journal during your deployment? Maybe it’ll be good to spend some time at the end of the day to write down your thoughts and feelings throughout the day. What have you seen, what have you done and what impact or difference have you made to some other people’s lives? Write a letter to your wife and your kids if possible and pass the whole bunch to them when you’re back. When they read them, they’ll be able to feel how you felt when you were carrying out your duties. In a way, these letters and your journal connect them with you. They serve as a great ice-breaker too, don’t you agree?

If writing is tough for you, how about doing a voice recording? MP3 players double up as voice recorders nowadays and they’re very portable. Or maybe taking photos will do the trick too!

You may feel awkward to be intimate with your wife after such a long absence. Well, be prepared to feel awkward (tell yourself it’s ok!), at the same time pull on your old charm and rekindle that passion again!

If things really turn too awry in your relationship and it’s getting too tough to handle, like if you’re having too many heated arguments, excessive anger or any unresolved emotional burden you inherited from your last deployment, be open to look for a marriage counsellor.

The main point is, reconnecting with your spouse doesn’t just come naturally just because you’re both married to each other. It needs some effort on both parties. Though it may be challenging at times, but the rewards of a healthy, loving and lasting marriage is definitely worth much more than what you’ve put in.

The Army Husband’s Guide 2 – Missing You

Your wife misses you when you’re not around. Take this to be the default situation.

So, what can she do when she’s missing you?

She can mop around the house feeling miserable about herself, and questioning again for the thousandth time why did she marry a soldier?

Or, she can stroll around the house feeling your presence at every nook and cranny, thereby filling up her love tank even as you aren’t physically there.

I’ll bet you want her to feel loved, rather than frustrated. The challenge lies in – how can you achieve this when you’re not around most of the time?

Maybe the following tips might help you to tackle this easier.

1. Leave your footprints everywhere. You can do this by sticking post-it notes everywhere in the house. In the kitchen. On the mirror. In her wallet. Inside the pocket of her jacket. In the pantry. Behind the TV. On the toilet bowl. On her toothbrush. In the microwave oven.

2. Start a project with her. It can be a jigsaw puzzle, or collecting growing a potted plant. Something for her to continue working on when you’re on deployment. As it is a project that both of you started together, it’s a good source of energy for her when she’s missing you. It’s as if you’re there with her doing it, even though you’re not. 

3. Take lots of photographs together. Nothing is more comforting than to be able to see our loved one’s face when we miss them sorely.

4. Send her flowers. You can ask someone to do it for you on your behalf periodically when you’re not around. If it’s possible, you can pre-write some cards and pass them to your friend to attach it to the flowers.

5. Set up an anchor. Find something that your wife likes and give more meaning to it. It can be a plush toy you gave her on your wedding anniversary. It can be the couch in which both of you spend time snuggling on while watching DVD at home. It can be a mug with a personalised message written by you to her. Just get an item and create wonderful memories around it. So that when your wife misses you too much, all she needs is to be near or hold this item close to her heart and release this flood of love and warmth into her.

These five methods may sound easy, but when you and your wife have been married for more than a decade, when you’re already so bogged down with your duties, you don’t see the need to do such things anymore. You’ve lost the motivation, unlike newly-wed couples.

After all, as your wife, she has to be understanding of your job, be supportive and not make any requests that will eat into your resting time.

That is true. At the same time, there is no marriage in this world that doesn’t require any work on either party to maintain it. Ask your wife if she’d be happy to receive a love gesture from you. I’ll bet her answer is yes, regardless if she’s a fifty year old mother of three, or a twenty-five year old young bride of yours.

And if making a small effort goes a big way into keeping your marriage loving and healthy, why not? 

A Singaporean Trait?

Who would have guessed it? It wasn’t the day of Toto with its seductive $10 million prize. Neither was it a day of 4D. Then, why would the queue be so long?

The origin of the human chain revealed the answer. They were all in the line to exchange their EZ-link card. Yesterday was supposed to be the last day for the free exchange. But, as I had predicted pretty well, the deadline was extended by one more week.

Is one week enough? Well, I believe that there would still be that many people who would only do it at the eleventh hour come next Wednesday.

It seems like doing things at the last minute is no longer something common among youngsters, for I see uncles and aunties forming part of the body of this snaking queue.

Well, to give them the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they were there on behalf of their forgetful children.

Walking past this long queue suddenly gave me a sense of satisfaction that I had, very early on, finished this task, all thanks to my dad for changing it for me and my mum for nagging me to do it early.

My mum and I walked past the queue in the MRT station and she commented with a smirk: “Wait till last minute then change. Do it early and there’s no queue!” I cannot agree more. At the same time, my empathy goes to all those “last-minuters” because I’m so one of them, actually.

Isn’t it kind of reassuring to know that a big part of the nation is with me in this aspect? Procrastinating doing something that irks us, something that is not that important yet is ever so necessary.

My mum, of course, is singing a completely different tune than me and the thousands of those who are in the queue in the various MRT stations sprawled all over Singapore.

You see, my mum is someone who will always be earlier. If we’re supposed to leave home for an appointment at ten, she’ll be ready by nine-thirty. If the deadline for a project is one month, she’ll complete it within a week, if it so allows.

I’m quite the opposite. Well I love to finish something early, however I realise that I thrive on the adrenaline rush that I get at the eleventh hour – when I know that the deadline is no longer creeping up slowly but chasing after me like fire caught in my pants.

Our different character proves to be more conflict than harmony. So when she tells me she’s ready to go thirty minutes before the appointed time, I gently remind her that there’s still half an hour more to go. She’ll usually mumble a “better to be early than late” and I’ll reply with a “I don’t want to stand there and waste my time waiting for thirty minutes”.

But, amid these differences, life still continues to go on for us. In as much harmonic as we can possibly achieve.

A last bit of advice. Go and exchange your EZ-link card as soon as you can, for if you miss this extra week, then you really have no more excuse to give other than admit the fact that you’re simply too not bothered to do it.

Or you can just admit it: “I’m lazy.”

Have your lunch free on the World Wide Web

Your strategy in these hard times is to follow the philosophy that the best things in life are free, or at least relatively cheap, like the public parks with their lush greenery and fresh air, the airconditioned comfort of the public library and of course Internet services.

Super-rich Web-based companies are building gigantic server farms, with mountains of computers piled on top of one another, so that they can offer you unlimited storage and content.

Unlimited storage

You are encouraged to put an unlimited amount of your content – from blogs and bad poetry to blurry pictures and shaky video clips – on Flickr, MySpace, Facebook, YouTube, Google Gmail, Yahoo, Microsoft MSN, and hundreds of other social media sites. And with cheap bandwidth, file sizes would no longer matter.

Here’s one tip I learnt from a software engineer: if you have not done so already, open a Google Gmail e-mail account. Whatever interesting material you come across (text, clips, photos) which you want to store for future reference, send an e-mail to yourself on Gmail, with the material as a file attachment. When that e-mail is in your Inbox, label it appropriately and archive. Use the built-in Search box to retrieve your material.

Using Gmail, you eventually build up a large database of the stuff that interests you; the material will always be online and available whenever you access your Gmail account.

High-quality editorial content

You can also freely read, copy (but don’t plagiarise) and add your comments to an unlimited stream of high-quality news reports, reviews and features, informative articles, scholarly articles, research papers, how-to tips and guides and other original editorial contents which just 2 years ago, would have cost a small fortune in subscription for newspapers, magazines and journals.

These excellent, free content sites include the BBC World Service (the gold standard of journalistic reporting), Businessweek (the most comprehensive coverage of world business and economic development), Wired (technology), Newsweek and Time magazine, the Economist, most newspapers online, and thousands more. So, ignore those paying sites.

Even better, you can use Google’s free productivity applications for word processing, making presentation slides, photo-editing and other tasks that would normally be done by expensive Microsoft Office programs.

Other online services and software applications are also using the free-lunch approach. As the Economist puts it, “because it is so cheap to offer digital services online, it doesn’t matter if 99 percent of your customers are using the free version of your services so long as 1 percent are paying for the premium version. After all, 1 percent of a big number can also be a big number”.

Be free, stay free.